Sexual Orientation, Sexual Harassment and the Teen Years

You would think in this day and age that sexual orientation and sexual harassment/bullying would cease to exist.  That one would be free and encouraged to be true to oneself and that others would be found to be supportive and loving to those perhaps different then themselves.  The biases continue to be prevalent in our communities. 

One of the passages from childhood into adolescence is the development and understanding of sexuality. This includes understanding one’s body, gender identity, sexual orientation, and values about sexual activity. During this time many teens begin to explore their sexuality and can be a very challenging time of transitioning. When a teen is questioning their sexual orientation it can be a very lonely and difficult time in their lives.

What Is Sexual Harassment?
Sexual harassment occurs when a person is subject to unwelcome sexual advances, requests for sexual favors, or other verbal or physical conduct of a sexual nature to such an extent that it alters the conditions of the person's employment and creates an abusive environment. Sexual harassment may include touching, feeling, groping and/or repeated unpleasant, degrading and/or sexist remarks. (UsLegal.com)

What Is Sexual Orientation?                                                                                                 Sexual orientation is a person’s sexual identity as it relates to the gender to which they are attracted. Sexual identity terms have been abbreviated and are now commonly referred to as LGBTQ or the LGBTQ community.
LGBTQ does not include heterosexual individuals. Heterosexual or “straight” individuals are attracted to the opposite sex.
Homosexual terms are each represented by a corresponding letter of the alphabet:
L – Lesbian – woman who is attracted to females.
G – Gay – male who is attracted to males
B – Bisexual – male or female attracted to both sexes.
T – Transgender – A person whose self-identity doesn’t conform to conventional typing. An example would be a person whose gender was designated at birth based genitalia but feels that the true self is the opposite sex or a combination of both sexes. (Non-identification or non-presentation as the sex one was assigned at birth).
Q – Queer – An umbrella term for persons who feel outside of norms in regards to gender or sexuality but do not wish to specifically self – identify as L, G, B or T.
Sexual messages and behavior teens witness affect their lives more than most adults care to realize. Advocates for positive youth development have worked to expose and transform the sexual toxicity of our popular culture—one that can potentially poison our youth if we do not teach them a healthy view of sexuality. 

According to recent gay bullying statistics, gay and lesbian teens are two to three times as more likely to commit teen suicide than other youths. About 30 percent of all completed suicides have been related to sexual identity crisis. Students who also fall into the gay, bisexual, lesbian or transgendered identity groups report being five times as more likely to miss school because they feel unsafe after being bullied due to their sexual orientation. About 28 percent out of those groups feel forced to drop out of school altogether.

In a 2005 survey about gay bullying statistics, teens reported that the number two reason they are bullied is because of their actual or perceived sexual orientation or gender expression. The number one reason reported was because of appearance. Teens are at a pivotal point in their young adult lives when they are trying to find out who they are and who they are about to become as adults. This is why being teased, bullied and harassed is something that could negatively affect a person's self-esteem and view of themselves for the rest of their life.

In fact, about 9 out of 10 LGBTQ teens have reported being bullied at school within the past year because of their sexual orientation, according to the most recent gay bullying statistics. Out of those numbers, almost half have reported being physically harassed followed by another quarter who reported actually being physically assaulted.  Unfortunately, most teens that experiences bullying of any kind are reluctant to share their experience or report the incident to a teacher or trusted adult. Even more unfortunate are the gay statistics that report a lack of response among those teachers and school administration. According to a recent statistic, out of the students that did report harassment or bullying situation because of their sexuality, about one third of the school staff didn't do anything to resolve the issue. (© 2013 Bullying Statistics - Stop Bullying, Harassment, and Anti-Bully in School/Work.)
For all teens, an environment that feels safe is of key importance. This includes an explanation of confidentiality. Fear of a lack of confidentiality is a significant barrier to adolescents disclosing anything of a personal nature .Teens should be given the opportunity to discuss issues of sexual attraction and orientation, mental health, substance and alcohol use, safer sex, school, family and friends. (Pediatric Child Health Vol. 13 No 7 September)
What Can You Do?                                                                                                                              If You See Something, Say Something! No child or adolescent deserves to be bullied. Do not tolerate any anti-homosexual slurs!
• Work with student government, local agencies and organizational clubs to hold programs on respect, school safety, and anti-bullying.
• Be alert to signs of youth who may be in distress.
• Encourage any young person who is bullied to tell a teacher, counselor, or parent.
• Provide confidential help-consult with a school counselor or other mental health professional if you feel uncertain about how best to support a victim.
• Support training and education for the community about these issues.

We all need to observe and think about our own attitudes and language about sexual harassment, sexual assault, and rape. We need to look at the messages we send with our actions and attitudes. Just because someone is making different choices than what we believe to be right and acceptable doesn’t give us the right to tell them how they should live or act.  How are we judging and criticizing? Examine our thoughts. Do you give the indirect or direct message that the survivor of sexual assault or harassment is wholly or partially to blame for what is happening? Step up and make a difference, support and encourage those around your community, your family and your friends to stop the violence and encourage peace!


- Ralph Waldo Emerson 

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