Silence Is Not Consent

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These photographs speak to me strongly about consent and language.  There are no words, only images, yet all of us can tell that these are not consensual encounters.  Many people who speak out against affirmative consent say that asking every five minutes doesn’t make people feel sexy.  I personally don’t believe asking “is this ok?”  disrupts anything, but for argument’s sake, I will help people read body language.  If someone is gripping your wrist or pushing your hands away, that means you should ask if they want you to continue.  If someone is lying completely still, that means you should ask if they want you to continue.  If from your perspective, someone seems to be enjoying it, ask if they want to continue.  Just keep asking!  If the other person is enjoying the encounter, you get to hear "yes, good job!  Keep going!"  If the person is not, STOP!  You get to save yourself and the other person from a terrible experience.  I understand that as an advocate, I look at these photographs and clearly see “NO” radiating from every being of the survivors’ bodies, but other people may not.  Silence is not implied consent.  It is important for all of us to continue to check in with our partners so that both partners feel heard, appreciated and respected. 

Photo credit:  Yana Mazurkevich, created for sexual assault awareness media platform Current Solutions


http://currentsolutions.co

Written by: Katy K., Northumberland County and Legal Advocacy Coordinator

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