Transitioning Times

This is hands-down one of the best Public Service Announcements I have seen.  It not only brings up issues of consent, but it also encourages bystander intervention. This scenario is a great example of how someone is still awake, waking around, somewhat engaging with others, but is not in a position to consent to sexual activity.  You can see her glassed-over eyes, her swaying, her vacant stare, her complacency.   There is a lot of discussion about consent intellectually , but on the street, on campus, in the bar, I don't think people know the difference between who is a person having a fun time, making informed decisions and who isn't.  How do you solve a problem like that?  ASK!  I once read an article that encouraged people to just ask others "are you ok?" if you suspect anything...domestic violence, child abuse, human trafficking, anything that smells fishy, just ask the person.  If they aren't ok, it gives them the opportunity to say no, a...

At a recent Keith Urban concert, a 17 year old was sexually assaulted.  This news alone has been far too common lately.  But, what I would like to highlight is the following from the article .   The attack only allegedly came to an end when a woman asked the victim if the act was consensual. “Do you want this?” the woman was heard saying. According to a police report,  the girl said , “no,” and then a witness “saw the female break free and run.” This is what everyone, ourselves included, is talking about when we preach bystander intervention.  It is this easy!  Simply asking this young woman "do you want this?" showed her that she didn't have to continue, and it allowed the sexual assault to end.  Four words.  That powerful. Lots of people in the media talk about what we can do to end sexual assault.  THIS.  This is what we can do.  Men or women, when you see a situation that seems out of control or odd, if you feel sa...

April has been designated by the National Sexual Violence Resource Center (NSVRC) as Sexual Assault Awareness month.   Granted, sexual assault is not a pleasant topic, especially when it involves children, which is the focus of this year’s awareness.    When we hear of cases where adults have used children as a means to gratify themselves sexually, most of us are appalled and outraged.    It is always an additional shock to find out that many people knew or suspected the wrongdoing all along, and did nothing to stop it. Surely if bystander adults only knew of the dire, sometimes life-spanning, physical and mental health issues that face our young victims, more people would step forward to prevent all forms of sexual harm to children.   No matter how objectionable the topic, this is a serious issue that needs to be at the forefront of our thoughts, our plans, and our policies, not just here at Transitions, but in our homes, schools, churches, and comm...

Voyeurism can be a dirty word, especially in light of the stalking victims that we at Transitions see.  However, I am referring to the voyeurism that happens when people allow themselves to be photographed, or when we see something in public that seems like it should occur in private--a fight, a spanking, a scolding, an insult. Time Magazine recently published a photo essay "Photographer as Witness: A Portrait of Domestic Violence."   I would strongly urge you to view this essay.  Its images are powerful, and it has raised some important questions.  Many people making comments have expressed disgust at the photographer for idly standing by while Maggie, the subject, is abused physically, verbally, and emotionally.  How would you respond?  How have you responded?  Have you ever seen something that maybe just didn't "sit right" with you?  Have you ever intervened?  Sometimes, when staff are in the community, we are as...