Transitioning Times

Dear Mom and Dad: Stopping child sexual abuse before it happens is one of the best responses to child sexual abuse, but it is also one of the most difficult conversations to have with parents.  As a prevention educator, I puzzle over why some parents unwittingly fail their children in regards to taking the necessary measures to protect them from child sexual abuse.  Admittedly, child sexual abuse makes us feel sick inside.  It fills our hearts with dread and our minds with confusion.  It is downright scary to contemplate that one of our friends or trusted family members may be a potential predator.  It is all too easy to tell ourselves that this happens to other people and in other families since nobody in our circles would dream of doing such a thing.  If only this were true.  A father told me last week that he did not want to destroy his first-grader’s innocence.  “Why does she need to know about such things?  I do not want her...

Originally published in 1996, with a second edition printed in 2003, Uncle Willy’s Tickles, by Marcie Aboff teaches children about their personal boundaries, or body sovereignty, a term used by professionals in the field of child safety.  Recognized by the American Psychological Association as a “wonderful way to address the important issue of a child’s right to own his own body and say no,” this book is one of five books chosen by the Care for Kids curriculum – an early childhood sexuality and abuse prevention program designed for kids from PreK through second grade.  Taking a different approach from other books that address sexual touching, this book features Kyle who is tickled by a beloved uncle named Willy.  Uncle Willy is a wonderful uncle who lets Kyle sit behind the wheel of his pickup truck and pretend to drive.  He takes Kyle ice cream sundaes and can do all sorts of magic tricks that make Kyle and his whole family laughs and has fun.  Kyle eviden...

Studies show that as many as one in four girls and one in six boys will experience sexual abuse by the age of 18.  Nine out of ten child abuse victims know the abuser.  Child sexual abuse can have long-lasting impacts on the victim, including behavior problems, poor school performance, and substance use.  April is Sexual Assault Awareness and Child Abuse Prevention Month.  Transitions of PA and  Susquehanna Valley CASA – Voices for Children have partnered to bring Matthew Sandusky, adopted son of Jerry Sandusky, to the Lewisburg Area High School Auditorium at 6:30 p.m. on Wednesday, April 27, 2016.  Matthew will share a message of hope as he talks about his journey of healing to support and encourage others.  Doors will open at 5:30 p.m.  This event is free to the public, but registration is required.  Tickets are available by visiting www.transitionsofpa.org . Matthew is the 2015 recipient of Darkness to Light’s Voice of Courage A...

Child sexual abuse wreaks havoc upon kids.   A child’s developing body is not built for abuse, especially sexual abuse.   Sexual abuse not only harms their little bodies, but can also leave ongoing social and emotional scars upon the boy or girl.   In some cases, the child suffers developmentally and may never experience the joys of a healthy sexual relationship or becoming a parent as an adult.   They can grow up feeling helpless, humiliated, and develop a deep mistrust of others.   For others, childhood sexual assault can lead to becoming prey to other predators because of their psychologically weakened state. Kids who are sexually violated by adults and older kids often regress.  They start to suck their thumbs and wet the bed, have bad dreams, tummy aches, and problems at school.  They may withdraw from others and stop getting along with other children.     Many survivors of childhood sexual abuse turn to drugs, alcohol, pro...

I am a survivor!  I have had a lifetime of sexual assault.  The first time was from an uncle that lived in my grandmother’s home.  He was my caretaker when my grandmother was at work.  He would have me fondle him and at times would touch me.  I never told anyone.  This started my journey of being victimized time and time again, the next time in my life was by a neighbor boy, he would touch me and make a game out of it, as I was a teen when I was babysitting, sleeping on the couch and the father of the children tried touching me and crawling on top of me, luckily his wife came out when I yelled and the man pretended that he was too drunk to know what he was doing.  After all this, a man I was dating coerced me to have sex with him after pleading with him on several occasions saying that I was not ready,  I just gave up.  Lastly, I married with not knowing what a positive sexual experience was; the sexual abuse I suffered with him was as devas...

Sexual assault can affect anyone men, women, and unfortunately even children.   Every year, an alarmingly high number of children become victims of sexual assault and many of these children never get the support or assistance they need after such a traumatic occurrence.   In the spirit of Sexual Assault Awareness Month, we hope to raise awareness on the importance of educating children, parents, and communities about child sexual abuse prevention, in hopes that far less children are affected by sexual assault. Child sexual abuse can be a devastating event in the life of a child.   Many children are embarrassed, scared, or too confused to come forward with the abuse that has happened to them.   In many cases these children live the majority of their childhood and perhaps the rest of their lives without ever telling about the abuse that has happened to them.   When a child goes on without disclosing abuse it can follow them and affect them even into adul...

April has been designated by the National Sexual Violence Resource Center (NSVRC) as Sexual Assault Awareness month.   Granted, sexual assault is not a pleasant topic, especially when it involves children, which is the focus of this year’s awareness.    When we hear of cases where adults have used children as a means to gratify themselves sexually, most of us are appalled and outraged.    It is always an additional shock to find out that many people knew or suspected the wrongdoing all along, and did nothing to stop it. Surely if bystander adults only knew of the dire, sometimes life-spanning, physical and mental health issues that face our young victims, more people would step forward to prevent all forms of sexual harm to children.   No matter how objectionable the topic, this is a serious issue that needs to be at the forefront of our thoughts, our plans, and our policies, not just here at Transitions, but in our homes, schools, churches, and comm...

Content from the blog of the Pennsylvania Coalition Against Rape , (PCAR) Joseph Amendola, attorney for former Penn State assistant football coach Jerry Sandusky, was in court Monday threatening to request that criminal charges against his client be dropped. Sandusky is charged with 52 counts of child sexual abuse involving 10 minors beginning in 1994. Amendola, arguing before Judge John M. Cleland at a pretrial hearing in Bellefonte, Centre County, claims that he needs a more specific time frame from the alleged victims in order to better defend his client. If he does not get that information, Amendola says he will make a motion for all of the charges to be dropped. The trial is set to begin May 14. Judge Cleland ruled that Amendola’s request is moot and cited nine Pennsylvania cases that have refined the standards and expectations for discovery in child sexual assault cases. Judge Cleland ruled that the Commonwealth has established greater latitude when the alleged crimes invol...

As a sexual assault center, Transitions often takes calls and provides services to parents and family members of children who have been sexually abused.  While it is very difficult to completely prevent child sexual abuse from occuring, the PA Sexual Offenders Assessment Board released the following list to help unsuspecting caregivers recognize grooming behaviors.  It is this grooming that allows for predators to perpetrate undetected, often for extended periods of time.  They have also released a video , available on their website, called Unusual Suspects.  The 11 Methods and Styles Used by Child Molesters from PA Sexual Offenders Assessment Board One of the most difficult topics for parents to understand and comprehend is the variety of “methods” that child molesters and abductors use to get physically close to children. One of the primary reasons that this topic is difficult to confront is that the approaches used by adults who “seduce” children ap...