Transitioning Times

What’s that song you’re listening to?’ ‘Who sings it?’ These are common questions we ask the people around us or search the internet to discover. But how often do we ask, ‘What is this song about ?’ Every day people are exposed to music at home, in the car on the way to/from work or children’s activities, at stores, in the community. We don’t even pay much attention to most of it, and yet we can find ourselves humming or singing along with friends, family, or children, not really knowing what messages we may be endorsing by joining in on those catchy tunes and repeated refrains. In recent years, there has been much media attention given to this question about the messages contained in both lyrics and corresponding videos. A few years ago people were talking about Robin Thicke’s ‘ Blurred Lines ’, featuring T.I. and Pharrell Williams, which repeats the phrase, ‘You know you want it.' Lyrics like this perpetuate the idea that someone else has the right to tell you, when you...

The Washington Post recently posted an article stating  "One Way to End Violence Against Women?  Married Dads." From the article: The bottom line is this: Married women are notab ly  safer  than their unmarried peers, and girls raised in a home with their married father are markedly less likely to be abused or assaulted than children living without their own father. But also from the article:  ... married men can and do abuse or assault their wives or daughters. Marriage is no panacea when it comes to male violence. But married fathers are much less likely to resort to violence than men who are not tied by marriage or biology to a female. There has been an outcry about the recklessness of linking safety with being married, specifically on Slate, with an article stating   "Marriage Will Not Save Women From Male Violence." From the article: One of the most confounding issues when it comes to domestic violence is that many victims believe that if the...

The following is a statement that has been widely distributed from the National Task Force to End Sexual and Domestic Violence Against Women regarding the 112th Congress's decision to not reauthorize the Violence Against Women Act. January 3, 2013 The 113 th Congress must pass VAWA immediately. We wish you a safe and happy new year!  Over the holidays, we have had time to pause to reflect on our progress in authorizing a strong and responsive VAWA.  Now, as 2013 begins, we know that we cannot lose momentum.  Join with us in 2013 to ensure early passage of this essential legislation.   Thanks to the tireless efforts of you, the countless advocates and supporters, we made critical advancements in educating Congress and the general public on the real needs of all victims of domestic violence, dating violence, sexual assault, and stalking.   And Congress responded to our effort...

The Reauthorization of the Violence Against Women Act (VAWA) has become embroiled in a contentious partisan debate about a variety of issues, including immigration, native rights, and rights of LGBTQ individuals.   We are pleased that the Senate passed a new version of VAWA which includes increasing the number of visas available to victims of domestic violence who are undocumented immigrants, bans discrimination against gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender victims of domestic violence, and gives Native American tribes more authority in prosecuting domestic violence offenses.   It also restructures some grants and creates new funding for programs on college campuses.   It has many positive changes, but it still excludes some individuals, including Alaskan Native tribes. One of the issues that is left out of the House of Representatives’ version of the Violence Against Women Act is allowing Native American tribes more discretion in prosecuting domestic v...

Many of our posts are about the impact violence has on its victims, often specifically violence against women.  We have been rallying to get the Violence Against Women Act reauthorized , a great deal of our time is spent helping domestic violence victims, often women.  Much of our work is reactionary, how to heal, how to deal, what to do after a traumatic event.  But what if there was no violence against women?  What if the climate that allows, ignores or encourages men to perpetrate violence against women changed?  There are organizations that are working to  challenge men and boys to define their own masculinity.  I was especially moved by a speech given by Tony Porter about the "manbox."  Men are told that their emotions need to contained within a box that includes only anger and fearlessness.  Men and boys are taught that they are strong, which in turn means women are weak.  That in order to be a "real" man, th...