Transitioning Times

Making happiness our goal may seem like a shallow aim when we have survived domestic violence, sexual assault, or any kind of crime that leaves us feeling defenseless, vulnerable, and afraid.  Worrying about our safety and the safety of our children and loved ones may seem not only justifiable but the only sane thing to do.  However, the kind of happiness that I am referring to is the kind that provides a sound basis for building a positive future.  This kind of happiness is good for our mental health, gives us hope that we need for recovery, and helps us come out the other side of all the dreadful things that have happened and live productive, meaningful lives characterized by love, freedom, fun, and belonging.  Having personally witnessed the power of happiness to aid recovery from all the harmful things that life can throw our way, I was pleased to find an article in Business Insider that promoted the idea that neuroscience has basically uncovered the same ...

These photographs speak to me strongly about consent and language.  There are no words, only images, yet all of us can tell that these are not consensual encounters.  Many people who speak out against affirmative consent say that asking every five minutes doesn’t make people feel sexy.  I personally don’t believe asking “is this ok?”  disrupts anything, but for argument’s sake, I will help people read body language.  If someone is gripping your wrist or pushing your hands away, that means you should ask if they want you to continue.  If someone is lying completely still, that means you should ask if they want you to continue.  If from your perspective, someone seems to be enjoying it, ask if they want to continue.  Just keep asking!  If the other person is enjoying the encounter, you get to hear "yes, good job!  Keep going!"  If the person is not, STOP!  You get to save yourself and the other person from a terrib...

Recently, I’ve learned about a strong connection between foster care and human trafficking that I had never really thought about before. Children who are in the system are being trafficked, sometimes by foster care parents and sometimes by others outside the home. To traffickers, these children are seen as unwanted, disposable kids, which make them a good target. They’ve often already experienced abuse, and they’re less likely to have someone come after them if they go missing.  According to “T,” (Withelma Ortiz Walker Pettigrew) a young activist who was in foster care from birth to age 18 and trafficked for 7 of those years, many foster care parents care more about the paycheck and make that known to the children in their homes. With this mentality, children quickly become used to the idea that their worth is limited, and they are only good for someone else’s monetary gain (Saar, 2014). “T” states, “The most stable relationship I had while in foster care was with my pimp and his ...

Transitions of PA is growing! We have recently hired two new Legal Advocates to serve Union and Northumberland Counties. These individuals will assist victims navigate the justice system, file for protection orders, and provide civil and criminal court accompaniment. Bernadette F. is the new Legal Advocate for Union County.  She is a 2015 graduate of Bloomsburg University with a Bachelor of Arts in Public Relations.  Bernadette is excited to embark on this new career journey. With a background in domestic violence and sexual assault from a college internship, Bernadette is very passionate about the field and looks forward to gaining more experience.   SHe is eager to take on projects where she can further utilize her mass communications skills.  Kim L. is the new Legal Advocate for Northumberland County. She graduated from Line Mountain High School and currently resides in Paxinos. She has been married for 14 years and has two children. She spent the last eig...

Divorce is fairly common in our society. For every two couples that get married this year, a third couple will get divorced.  According to the National Center for Health Statistics, more than 800,000 couples divorced in 2014.  While the divorce rate among couples who have children together tends to be lower than childless couples, 40% of divorcing couples do have children. This fact results in nearly half of all children experiencing the divorce of their parents (Larson, The Huffington Post, 2011.) 25% of those children will experience a high conflict custody battle (Maccoby and Mnookin, 1992.) This percentage does not include those children facing high-conflict custody whose parents were never married. Divorce is always stressful for every child, even when, in the long run, it is the healthiest choice that could be made.  For those children handling a high-conflict custody situation, the stress is even greater. There is a loser (or losers) in every custody battle. R...

We live in a rural area where many homes have guns in them.  In a lot of my interactions with clients, we discuss guns.  When I am assisting someone in obtaining a Protection from Abuse order, we talk about whether s/he wants to request the court order the Defendant’s guns be relinquished to the sheriff.  When I am discussing the Lethality Assessment Program with police departments, we talk about the greater likelihood of homicide  when guns are present in the home.    The “right to bear arms” is a hot topic in this area.  It seems to be common sense that if a person has been identified by the court system as a domestic violence abuser ,  s/he should not be allowed to own a gun.  However, this was recently   challenged at the Supreme Court of the United States. The central issue in this case was whether abusers who commit crimes of domestic violence recklessly should lose their rights to own guns in the same manner as those...

An intimate partner can jeopardize a person’s housing.  Not having a roof over your head can increase the risk you face.  The National Sexual  Violence Resource Center (NSVRC), operated by the PA Coalition Against Rape, has research indicating that nearly 10% of women and 8% of men who experienced housing insecurity or homelessness in the past year (2015), had a higher prevalence of intimate partner violence.  For women, it is the leading cause of homelessness in America according to the National Center Against Domestic Violence. The NSVRC has found that 61% of girls and 16% of boys say sexual abuse at home is why they left.   Many LGBT youth leave their homes because they were rejected as a result of their gender identity and/or sexual orientation.  46% of these youth run away, and 43% indicate they were forced to leave. Youth who leave their homes are preyed upon by human traffickers.  70% of youth aged victims living on the streets are...