Music Video Glamorizes Unhealthy Behavior

I wish I didn't have to write blogs like this.  I wish those people who think domestic violence, sexual assault, and stalking are not accepted by society were right.  Alas, this is not the case.
In our training of new staff and volunteers, we watch films by Jean Kilbourne, and Sut Jhally, including Killing Us Softly and Dreamworlds 3.  These films focus on the role that violence against women plays in advertising and music videos.  This awareness has bred outrage and outcry from feminists about the images and messages from the media.  In the recent past, there was loud descent from the feminist blogosphere about rape culture, specifically about the song of last summer, Blurred Lines.  I thought maybe this reaction would cause record labels and artists to consider more thoughtfully the messages they are promoting, not because of any dedication to social justice, but in light of commercial sales figures.  I was wrong.  In fact, this same artist, Robin Thicke, has a new song that, although does not promote rape culture, it does stick to high heaven of glamorizing stalking and the idea that if you are persistent enough, a woman will eventually say yes to getting back together.   



Feministing.com has a great blog post about this, and I would encourage you to read it, but I did want to address some other issues in the video that bothered me as a domestic violence advocate.  
In the video, Robin Thicke puts a finger up to his head multiple times.  I understand the colloquialism of "kill me now" and the related gesture; however, when you correlate killing yourself with your partner leaving you, that is a method of power and control.  I cannot tell you how many times, over the course of my work with Transitions that I have heard our clients say their abuser has threatened suicide when they talk about leaving. The incessant texting that is depicted in the video is obviously another abusive behavior that I see in my work.  This is not consensual and can be considered harassment.   
When abusers see their behavior portrayed as normal and encouraged by celebrities, this empowers them.  Male peer support has been shown to encourage abusive behavior and actually minimize any guilt that abusers may feel.  These messages are harmful to both men and women.  Many people argue that media critics are reading too much into music videos, news articles and how things are worded.  I would argue that in today's media-saturated world, where many people, including children, are tapped into a screen most of the time, these messages are more important than ever before.  What people consider normal is what they see on their screens, and if harmful images are not identified and questioned, this behavior will continue to infiltrate every aspect of society.