Transitioning Times

#ThinkLikeGuy This is Guy.  He is 8 years old and he has some big ideas.  Here are Guy’s thoughts about #Likeagirl. Question: What does, “like a girl” mean? Guy:  It doesn’t mean really anything because everyone has a different way of doing things. Question:  If someone says, “You throw like a girl!” What does that mean? Guy: Well nothing really because everyone throws different. There is no throwing like a boy or girl. Throwing is just throwing. Question: If someone uses the phrase “like a girl,” is that ok to say? Guy:  It really isn’t ok to say because we are all the same.  We all do things different. It’s wrong and could hurt someone’s feelings. Boys and girls can do the same things. 

Among so much media coverage of poor responses to domestic violence, a beacon of light in the form of the U.S. government!   On August 26, 2014, the Board of Immigration Appeals granted a Guatemalan woman asylum in the United States.  To be eligible for asylum, a person must have suffered persecution, or have a fear of persecution based on race, religion, nationality, membership in a particular social group, or political opinion.  People argued for many years about whether victims of domestic violence made up a particular social group.  In the case of the woman who was recently awarded asylum, the argument was also made that the Guatemalan government did not protect her, as she asked for assistance from the police to stop the violence, but her cries went unanswered.  In their ruling, the Board of Immigration Appeals wrote that the woman suffered in silence due in part to a "culture of machismo and family violence." This decision affirms what many immigrant...

This past month or so, I have been asked my opinion more times than I can count about "this whole Ray Rice thing."  Well, what troubles me is, are they so different than anyone else?  I talk to maybe 8 to 10 people a week about leaving their abusive partner.  I work with law enforcement departments to try to encourage prosecution, if that's what the victim/survivor wants.  And I'm not the only one.  There are 15 people on staff here, and countless other programs to help victims.   I understand, of course, that Ray Rice is a celebrity, just like Chris Brown was a celebrity and much has been said about their behavior and subsequent punishments, or lack thereof.  But the truth is, how we treat celebrity abusers is often reflected in how we treat all abusers.  If we don't hold abusers accountable at the local level, why would anything be different when it plays out on a national stage?   Why do we keep thinking that domestic violence is betwe...

This summer, much criticism, including our own , was hurled at the NFL for its lack of punishment for Ray Rice, who had criminal charges brought against him due to an act of domestic violence.   On August 28, 2014, NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell  sent a letter to all NFL owners stating what they have been doing to rectify the vast differences in punishment for infractions of their policies, particularly their personal conduct policies vs. their drug policies.  I am very thankful that they have listened to the outcry and are trying to make their organization a safer, more respectful place, but there are still many questions to answer.  At the link above, one of the commentators asks if the new punishment would be applied to players who have been charged, but the charges are later dropped.  We know that many domestic violence charges get dropped for a variety of reasons, so this is a very valid question. I also have concerns about the following phrase: ...